timing is everything

So my oldest daughter called a few weeks ago and was in love with a VW Beetle. Out of the blue to me, but being 25, impulse buying is still to be expected. She found one on craigslist, a good buy, tan with black convertible top, a 2003. To her, it was perfect. And with a little coaching from mom and dad, she was off for a test drive, of course she loved it. She did find a mechanic to take it too, just to be sure. He found one little problem, the automatic transmission had a problem and needed to be replaced! Good thing she had it checked. Of course she was heart broken, but we assured her there would be another one, just the one God wanted her to have, if she was patient. Hmmm 25 and patient. Anyone see a problem here.

Well a week later, after much searching on the net, another car exactly like it came available at a dealer, with a few less miles, but same color, etc. But it was at a dealer....so given a little coaching from family and friends, off she went. Of course it was perfect, drove great, etc....one small problem. The price was more than she was going to spend. Told to wait and be patient....she did...for awhile. Then about a week later she was getting very antsy. She just had to have that car, she would get a bigger loan, etc. I was headed up to Seattle that weekend, so I told her to wait, and I would go with her to look around. She was sure this was the car.

Then, the night before I left for Seattle, her call came in. Her best friends husband, who is a top car salesman in Seattle, had a VW just come on the lot. One owner, super low miles, and ultra clean. They went over it with a fine tooth comb! And best of all, it was less than the first car she looked at and in much better condition. No negotiating, they just said they would treat her like family, sell the car for this much, making this much profit and it was good to go! And it is a great VW Beetle, a very nice blue, with brand new tires and brakes. It was a very good deal.

So that night, despite her being 'all growed up' at 25, came the teachable moment. Trust in God. He has your best interest at heart. In every area of your life, He cares.

And that teachable moment was pointed right back at me. For it is a struggle to plan on changes that are going to occur. At times I am overwhelmed with anxiety and fear. But I have nothing else, no, I have no one else, to hold on to except that weird Jesus guy! And best of all, I find He is holding on to me.

50 is half a hundred

Funny how a few years ago you look forward to something and then when it gets there, life has changed so much that you wish the day started and ended all at the same time. Today is that day for me. And the weather fits perfect, gray and rainy.

But on the bright side at least now I can get discounts on auto insurance, motel rooms, etc!

I do know this, faith is when you still believe despite of what is laid before you. And I still believe.

Closer than a brother

Quick, name your favorite song about friendship? Here are some to consider:
Lean On Me Bill Withers
That's What Friends Are For Dionne Warwick
You've Got A Friend James Taylor
Thank You For Being A Friend Andrew Gold
With A Little Help From My Friends The Beatles
Friends Michael W. Smith

Proverbs 18:24 states: A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. But what exactly does Proverbs 18 look like in real life? Not the quick "hi, how are you" conversations at church in the entry, not the "great game last night" conversations, but the "no, really, how are you" conversations. Lately I have noticed some 'friends' have become distant as the battle I'm going through has gone on. Some have made quick turns at church to avoid me. Others that a year or so ago would have enjoined me in conversation simply give a quick smile and head nod and off they go. So I've been asking God why, and what should I do about it? How can I make people more comfortable with what is going on in my life. And God is so kind. He continues to show me bit by bit the path in front. Not the whole path, but just enough to keep my feet moving forward. Here is what He said;

1. The plan for you is not just for you, but for your 'community'. Your 'community' is uncomfortable because of issues in them, issues that I (God) am aware of and am working on. I want healing for all.
2. Their reactions are not your responsibility.
3. I (God) am not surprised by their reactions, just as I (God) am not surprised or caught off guard by your reactions and emotions.
4. I am your friend (wow, really liked that one...sometimes you wonder from the silence)
5. Learn from the hurt what it means to be a friend...sometimes you haven't been a good one yourself.

Ouch..that one stung. But then God in His grace showed me times when I was not a good friend. Times I didn't pick up the phone and call someone I knew was hurting. Times I said "I'll pray for you" when what was really needed was taking time to sit and talk to the person. Times I walked a different direction to avoid someone. Times I ask 'how are you' when I really only wanted to hear "okay". Times I heard "okay" when I knew that was not the truth and I didn't take time to say "no, really, how are you?" Times when I stood still when what was needed was a hug, a long hug that says 'I'll be here with you'. I could go on and on. Boy do I have some learning to do!

Jesus himself calls us friends. I have often wondered what those meetings with tax collectors, prostitutes and other 'sinners' were like. What were the conversations going on like? Pretty salty I'm sure. Yet there was Jesus - eating, talking, loving. He was a friend to the friendless, the hopeless, the hurting. He was never too busy to put His arm around someone and say "I love you". He was not scared off by their lifestyle or by their 'sins'. He embraced the person within. That is the kind of friend I want to be. To be there when times are good and when times are bad, during the smiles and the tears. I want to be a friend like Jesus is to me.

The Plan

The Plan. I have been asked that more than a few times in the last few weeks. And I have no idea. What next, when, where, how. Lots of questions and few answers. So I go to the one who is supposed to have the answers and ask "okay God, what's the plan?" And God laid it all out, day by day, hour by hour, what would happen, when it would happen; every detail....uh no. That did not happen. Instead God gave me Romans 11:33 (amplified version) 33Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unfathomable (inscrutable, unsearchable) are His judgments (His decisions)! And how untraceable (mysterious, undiscoverable) are His ways (His methods, His paths)! 34For who has known the mind of the Lord and who has understood His thoughts, or who has [ever] been His counselor? 35Or who has first given God anything that he might be paid back or that he could claim a recompense? 36For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. [For all things originate with Him and come from Him; all things live through Him, and all things center in and tend to consummate and to end in Him.] To Him be glory forever! Amen (so be it). "So God, are you telling me that THE PLAN is not for me to know? And why is THE PLAN not MY PLAN? I mean, the way I see it and have been praying, my plan makes the most sense, at least to me." I think God chuckled at me. Then the Holy Spirit let me in on a secret: I don't live in a vacuum, I live in community! God was telling me that THE PLAN for me was not for me alone. For the tentacles of God are reaching out and touching many people through this difficult time. Using this trial, God is touching family, friends, church members, and coworkers. He is tilling soil that has to this time has been hard. He is working out things in their lives, making them think, pray and commit to love. He is working on other families in trouble, giving them a glimpse of what might be. Bottom line, His PLAN is that He be glorified. How that is going to work out, I have no idea whatsoever. And I think that is what Romans 11 is saying, like Jack Nicholson to Tom Cruise, "you can't handle the truth". His ways are so far above my comprehension. The whole plan would likely make my head explode!

Last Wednesday night, the lesson at church had seven points, all of which of course related to me and what is happening. God doesn't like to waste time, He just keeps teaching me.

1. God will keep his promise no matter what.
2. God will even use adversity to position me for blessing.
3. God will not always give you all the details (man, did I hate that one!)
4. God never forgets me even when I forget him.
5. God will make sure the more I am pressured, the more I will grow.
6. The pressure is part of Gods plan.
7. My trouble will stop when its accomplished Gods purpose.

So I am changing my prayer. No longer will I pray for God to change my circumstances. Turns out that is the easy prayer to say. Now I will pray, "Lord, whatever you are doing in me, continue to do, no matter how long it takes, or the roads I must travel."

Here is a song by Sanctus Real (posted on the right hand side). Sorry, they don't have a cool video out for it yet, but give it a listen and ask God what He wants you to learn from my trial. If your reading this, your part of the community!

Sad Beyond Comprehension

Today is easily the most profoundly sad day in my life. Nothing is even a close second. While I can't blog in detail about it yet, it involves a loss so great it grieves me to my core. At times I can barely hold a steady thought, and I have few tears left. Heaviness in my heart does not begin to paint the picture.

I sat in the church parking lot, not sure if I could make it through worship this evening. But God reminded me that 'yet I was to praise Him" As the Psalmist wrote in Psalm 42
5 Why are you sad, O my soul? Why have you become troubled within me? Hope in God, for I will praise Him again for His help of being near me. 6 O my God, my soul is troubled within me. So I remember You from the land of the Jordan and the tops of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. 7 Sea calls to sea at the sound of Your waterfalls. All Your waves have rolled over me. 8 The Lord will send His loving-kindness in the day. And His song will be with me in the night, a prayer to the God of my life.

So despite my emotions, despite the chaos that is running circles in my mind, I will trust in the Lord and continue to praise Him. And I acknowledge, that despite what is happening in front of my eyes, God is still in control and has a plan. Tonight PT talked about the struggles in life and the sovereignty of God. So once again, I give up to Him.....yet sadness is still my visitor. And He understands and weeps with me.

The Book or The Movie?

Well, since I have not seen the movie, I'll recommend the book. 'Lord, Save Us From Your Followers' is a tremendous book by Dan Merchant. Turns out ole Dan is a local guy, right here in Portland. I found his book to be both fun (laugh out loud many times) and humbling (those aren't tears, the sun is in my eye). LSUFYF takes a look at 'why the Gospel of love is dividing America'. Dan interviews Tony Campolo, Al Franken, Mike Rich (another local boy made good), Michael Reagan and others. His interview with Sister Mary Timothy is particularly good, from a "ouch, that hurts" standpoint.

Dan made a bumper sticker suit (yeah, a bumper sticker suit) and stood at congested places and talked to people. What transpires is a fascinating look at how people perceive God, the church, and Christians in particular. I could not put the book down.

http://lordsaveusthemovie.com/ Click on the link for a TEN minute preview of the movie. TEN MINUTES! Not the 30 second fillers other web sites give you, but a great look at what the whole movie will be like. Can't wait to see the whole thing.

BTA - Mothers Day Style

It's been about twenty years since my mom passed away from cancer. Started out as lung cancer and spread to her brain from there. It was not pleasant to say the least. I know, why am I blogging about something that would seem so depressing on such a day of celebration? The reason is simple, I wanted to take a moment to honor someone who took the term mother to another level, DC.

My mom came to live with us for the last three months or so of her life. Mom was frail from the moment she was assisted through the front door and no one, except God, knew how long she had left to live. She was just a shell of the lady she once was, chemo had taken its toll on her outward beauty. I can remember the very first night, when mom tried to make it to the bathroom by herself, and fell trying to sit down. I can imagine how she must have felt humiliated by having to be helped to even go to the bathroom. It was not long until mom was bedridden, wearing diapers and barely able to consume any nutrition. Her hair was long gone. Her body rail thin. Her mind, well it too was ravaged by the cancer. Often mom would sit up and hurl insults or shout curse words to those trying to help, but she had no idea what she was doing. It was not mom speaking, it was the disease that had overtaken her. It was not a pretty site.

But there was DC taking care of her 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. DC was there when no one else was, talking to mom, listening when mom could talk. I don't know all that was ever said, but I am sure mom was greatly comforted by her. DC was there, fixing different foods, trying to get mom to eat anything, trying to get her to sip her Ensure. Usually there was no success, mom just didn't taste anything. I imagine that could have been very frustrating, I know to me it would have been. DC? She just kept trying. Can you imagine what it is like, as an adult, to have to have someone change your diapers? To be so helpless that you have to be cleaned up by another? Not the most pleasant of tasks for the caregiver either. But there was DC, day and night, without fail or complaint, doing just that.

I can remember the night mom died. I had been able before to make sure she knew Jesus and was ready to go, and she was. I can't prove this, but I am as sure of this as anything I know, that mom knew Jesus because she had seen Him taking care of her for the last three months. For DC looked past all the unpleasantness of the tasks, the smells of looming death, the times of cursing and simply loved mom. My mom, she loved my mom as only Jesus could. I am sure there were times when DC was exhausted, physically and mentally. But she continued on. DC helped my mom to live out her last days with dignity, when all dignity was gone. And like DP with Harold on an earlier blog, Jesus wept, leaned forward and whispered to DC: 'thanks for feeding my sheep'

Blessed are the merciful for they shall receive mercy. My mom had nothing to give in return, but DC gave her mercy and love. Just as Jesus does.

Back To The Beginning

So I found myself in a situation the other night that wasn't going 'the way I wanted'. Ever been there? If not, check your pulse, you might be dead! Anyway, the words on one side were different than the words from me, yet both claimed to know the will of the Lord in the situation. Is that ever frustrating!!! And I felt anger and retaliation rearing up within me (truth about yourself is not always pretty to look at). I have been praying about this for some time and nothing seems to be working out. But it was Wednesday night, and I had committed to attend the midweek service, so off I went, full of the 'joy of the Lord'. Well not quite. I was ticked off. Right where God wanted me, full of myself and my desires and my pride and my...well full of me.
I think God prepared me for this exact moment, when the "me monster" was in charge. There was not a lot of 'Gods in charge' in my spirit at that moment, truthfully not even an ounce. That is when God works His best, when His words and desires are 180 degree opposite mine. And that is when words were spoken that were meant for me. Sure, there were 2,000 others there that night, but it was if God had a laser pointed right at my heart. "When folks give up on you, He will wait for you" stated PT. It cut through me like a knife. I could hear God say "Do you read your own blog? The first post. When you said when you are about to tap, THEN you rely on me. Remember those words I gave you? Give up, let me. You said you trust me. So give up to me. What if I answer your prayer in a way that is not your way? Will you still trust me? Will you still love me? What if I plan on answering your prayer on my time, not yours? Will you grow weary and stop contending in prayer? Or are you in this for the long haul? Others will fail you, but I am here waiting for you; always".

There He was, right with me the whole time, yet I had chosen to see through my own eyes, not His. At that point I was faced with a decision, continue on MY way, with the attached garbage or repent and move back into Him. God is interested in all of me, all my pain, all my hurt, all my sorrow, all my all my. And as worship continued, God wrapped His arms of compassion around me and assured me, that whatever the outcome, He will be with me.

And that is freedom.

Why work hard when you can have fun?

It was a week ago Wednesday, my last night doing chair set-up after the youth meeting. I'm not sure how many chairs we set up, something like 667 (Can't you imagine setting up 666 chairs and freaking out someone). We were only about two rows in when BN says to me "I can see why you would want to do a ministry that is fun, not a ministry that is such hard work". His words stunned me. I plunked down in a chair as BN sat next to me. You have to know this about BN; he is one of those people that when he talks, EF Hutton listens (aging myself I know, google it for you youngins). BN has a great sense of humor, a quick smile and loves kids. But when his eyes start to narrow, stop what your doing and give him your undivided attention; he is about to speak truth. I don't believe he even knows how profound his words often are, humbleness describes him well. So while we sat for a moment, he expounded on fun ministry verses hard work. I don't think he knows the whole story why I moved on from chairs (but BN, lets have coffee someday and talk about it), but it wasn't because of the hard work involved with chairs (and bless those that do chairs, it takes effort). But God knew exactly what He is teaching me and was using BN to get me to ask myself: 'am I willing to do the hard work God is calling me to do?'
Now this hard work takes on several forms:

1. Continuing to allow Christ access to the deep fears and struggles in my life and letting Him have lordship over those areas. That is very hard work, for me, not for Him. More on this in another blog.
2. Beating The Attitude (BTA); yep, when God is teaching you something that He thinks you really need to get a handle on, He ties it all together, through His word, worship, and His people. But really, is BTA really hard work? Reread the post from May 5th. Put yourself right in the midst of the chaos and pain, the anger, the sorrow, the cries for help. And Jesus looks at you and says:

• Go and be merciful to those that have ruined lives from choices they have made, that have no hope of recovery
• Go and comfort those that are mourning, that have sadness so deep they can't see the need to live another day
• Go and reconcile the families that are torn by strife, be a peacemaker
• Go and tend to the oozing soars and bulging tumors, but healing not only the physical wounds, but touching their broken spirits of humiliation and isolation. Show them you care. Look into their eyes, not past their tears

And fired up, you look away from Jesus and towards the crowds. Where to begin, the need is so great. Everywhere you look, need after need, broken life after broken life. Suddenly you are overwhelmed by the tasks at hand, and you turn back to Jesus and say "I can't. It's too hard. I don't know what to do or say. I'm not trained enough. Don't you have something easier". You half expect the Jesus that overturned the tables of the money-changers in temple to blast you, just as bosses, co-workers, and maybe parents have in the past. You can hear it coming: 'idiot, quitter, slacker, you'll never amount to anything'. But Jesus simply looks at you with compassion and says:

• Don't worry about what to say, for I will be speaking through you
• Don't worry about it being to hard, for it is my power that is at work through you
• Don't worry about training, it will be my hands extended through you
• Don't worry....just feed my sheep.

See Christ is culling out of me the chaff that clutters. He is asking me to love in a new way, to cast off the ties that bind and let His Spirit flow through me with renewed vigor. He is telling me this will be hard work. Fun? Don't know about that yet, could be. But this I know, that the joy He has planned is unspeakable and full of glory. Seeing lives changed when they encounter the weird Jesus is worth it all.

And the next Wednesday night, there was BN, loving kids through all they encounter....and setting up more chairs.

Appetizers

Do you ever hear someone say something and immediately in your mind goes 'wow, I have to digest that some more. There's great stuff there'. So I have noted a few items that have stopped me in my tracks the last two weeks. Take a read and let them simmer and rumble around in your spirit for a bit.

• When folks give up on you, He will wait for you. Pastor Ted Roberts
• Preach the gospel always, and when necessary use words. St Francis of Assisi
• Everybody in the world understands what Jesus was teaching, except for Christians Gandhi
• We're never as right as we think we are; we're never as wrong as we think we are. Tony Campolo
• I can see how you would want to do a ministry that is fun, not a ministry that is such hard work. Bruce N

Each of those spoke (and is still speaking, rather loudly I might add) to me the last two weeks. The gem by Bruce is the catalyst for my blog tonight, but its still stewing around in me! Check back later.....

Beat The Attitude: Hebrews 11 style

Continuing on the Beat The Attitude, I keep looking for examples of what the Beatitudes look like in action. Here is one from a guy I'll call PD. This is from his blog, used by permission.

Lessons from Harold
For the past several months I've had the opportunity to serve an elderly neighbor across the street. His name is Harold. He had fallen a couple of times last year, and when he did, we'd get a call from his wife Dorothy to come and help pick him up.
Harold had a stroke about three years ago that took his sight and most of his mobility. His condition got worse, and in mid-January of this year, instead of spending his last days in a care center, he and his wife opted for in-home hospice.
Harold was able to get out of bed in the morning without help - and his days were spent with his wife, enjoying meals together and playing his favorite game, "Skipbo." By the end of the day, however, he just didn't have the strength to get into bed on his own.
Instead of chancing continued falls by trying to get into bed on his own, we encouraged them to give us a call anytime if they needed help. So, nearly every evening since the middle of January - about 8:45pm, we'd get a call from Dorothy. I'd put on my flip-flops and head across the street to "put Harold in bed."
Each night was the same. He'd be ready in his wheelchair by his bed. I'd bend over and let him grab my neck so that I could lift him up and turn him towards the bed. I'd set him down, Dorthy would help get him ready for the evening, and then I'd swing his feet around and help lift the hospital bed.
The very first night I helped, he reached for my hand and said, "I don't suppose you got a prayer for me, do ya?" - So each night, after tucking Harold in, we'd hold hands and I'd get the privilege of praying with him and Dorothy before heading back across the street.
When Harold came home for in-home hospice in early January - Dorothy was afraid his time at home would be very short, but Harold enjoyed a great couple of months at home. I wasn't the only person that got to help with Harold. Steve Jones from Abundant Life was a Harold hero, too, as was my old friend Jim Newby. Jim's on the pastoral staff at Beaverton Foursquare. Jim did a couple of extended times with Harold, including a week that I had the flu, and this last week when we were out of town on the East Coast.
Harold died last week, and Jim and I were able to continue to serve the family by helping them put together a beautiful memorial service celebrating a life well lived.
When the service was over, one of Harold's relatives came up to me. He said he wanted me to know that he had helped Harold into bed on the Monday before he passed away (we were still on the East Coast). He told me, "You and your friend sure made an impression on Harold."
I asked, "How so?"
He said Harold told him, "You can help me into bed, but you know you have to pray with me."
Way to go, Harold!

Some minor details PD left out. He works tireless and many countless hours. He has three energetic kids he delights in spending time with. He is married to a wonderful lady (who has a great blog!), who he cherishes. As an IT guy, he takes endless text messages, phone calls, emails, and yes, now Twitters. Each says the same thing: HELP. And help he does. And PD has a bad back.
PD expends a ton of energy every day. I am sure at 8:30 at night, he loves sitting in his favorite comfy chair (we all have one), kicking his shoes off, putting his feet up, turning on the tube to his favorite show (oh good, a new episode) and taking a well deserved rest. And just as he settles in, the phone rings. It's 8:45. And boy do the complaints start. 'What? Right when my show is getting good? I just popped this corn, nice and hot. NOW the phone rings?' As PD opens the door to cross the street, the cold east wind blows a pelting rain directly into his face, stinging on contact; 'I should have let the phone ring'.

No, that didn't happen. Maybe at my house that would happen. But every night PD got up and considered it a privilege to answer the phone to serve Harold and Dorothy. Neither rain nor snow nor gloom of night could keep this carrier from his appointed rounds. PD knew it was appointed by God for him to do this. And I think Jesus wept. Not tears of sorrow, but from the great joy welled up within Him. And He leans forward and says 'PD, thanks for feeding my sheep'.

I sometimes wish God would make Hebrews 11, The Sequel (it worked for Oceans 11). If He did, I am sure you would find PD right there, front and center. Not because he wants to be there for ego, but because he can't help himself.

He is Beat The Attitude in action.

BEAT THE ATTITUDE

Time for a bit delayed Sermon Says #2. This is from 'What Jesus Had To Say About True Happiness' from the series 'Amazing' by PG on the weekend of 4/27. PG spoke on The Beatitudes, a section of scripture that truly depicts HOW Jesus commands us to love. When it was over, I kept thinking 'what does the Beatitudes in action actually look like?' I have been thinking about that since that Saturday night.

PG set the stage for Jesus' sermon, reading from Mathew 4: 23Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom, and healing every disease and sickness among the people. 24News about him spread all over Syria, and people brought to him all who were ill with various diseases, those suffering severe pain, the demon-possessed, those having seizures, and the paralyzed, and he healed them. 25Large crowds from Galilee, the Decapolis, Jerusalem, Judea and the region across the Jordan followed him. (NIV). Then you move to Mathew 5 and the eight Beatitudes. But I keep getting drawn back to Mathew 4. Read it again. Who is Jesus talking about in Mathew 5? People in chapter 4! Those suffering severe pain, demon-possessed, people suffering uncontrollable seizures, the paralyzed. Read it in the Message translation, (Mathew 4:23-24) He also healed people of their diseases and of the bad effects of their bad lives. Word got around the entire Roman province of Syria. People brought anybody with an ailment, whether mental, emotional, or physical. Let's not stop there, (hey, if God has allowed so many translations, we might as well use em!) 23 And Jesus went about all Galilee, teaching in the synagogues of them, and preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every languor and each sickness among the people [and healing all sorrow, or ache, and all sickness in the people]. 24 And his fame went into all Syria; and they brought to him all that were at mal-ease, and that were taken with diverse languors and torments, and them that had fiends, and lunatic men, and men in palsy [and they brought to him all men having evil, taken with diverse sores and torments, and them that had devils, and lunatic men, and men in the palsy], and he healed them (Wycliffe).

Can you wrap your head around that scene? I've always pictured Jesus talking to a large crowd, with people suffering from sickness, maybe a leper or two, some lame, blind and arthritic people. Picnic baskets for food. Blankets on the ground. A few sheep and goats of course. But that is not what scripture says. Sure lepers where there. Blind, lame and arthritic as well. Keep going: severe pain, demon-possessed, diverse sores, palsy. Now add in the mentally ill. Those that had ANY ailment, whether mental, emotional or physical. Now imagine what it was truly like. It was anything but a serene mountain top experience. A huge crowd of people. HUGE. There would have been yelling, both out of rage, pain, agony and shouts clamoring for Jesus' help. Cries from agonizing anguish. Sobs of deep despair and sorrow. Think of the emotional carnage of those who carried there loved ones up the mountain to see if Jesus could truly heal as they had heard. For many it would have been a last, desperate hope. It would have been chaos on the mountain; really quite a riotious crowd.

I can image the disciples were greatly taken back by what they were seeing and unsure of what they were to do. You see that frequently in them....just like a lot of us (me), wanting to do the right thing, but unsure of what it is. I think that is exactly why Jesus delivered the Beatitudes then and there. For right in front of the disciples eyes were the very people Jesus spoke about, that Jesus came for, that Jesus said to love. People that would be tough to deal with. Have you ever watched someone have a seizure? It can be very unsettling. Ever looked away from someone with a large tumor as they approached? How about walking downtown and running into a mentally ill street person talking to themselves and waving their hands around, and you quickly cross the street? What about someone in the late stages of aids? How about the meth addict whose face is covered in sores? Too tough? Then simply the single mom, struggling in so many ways, who drops by to talk, when you have so many other things to do and you don't want to hear her struggles one more time. How about the elderly driver, negotiating down the street at 20 in a 40 zone and being such an inconvenience to you? More? Sure, here it comes. How about laughing at gay jokes, or even instigating them? Or stereotyping people for a laugh? You know why I write these things? Because many, okay all, are from personal experience. And the worst part, (truth is freedom) done since I accepted Christ 28 years ago. And I believe Jesus wept.

Jesus asked me to love them all. Judging anyone is not my job. I am sure that when I get to heaven Jesus in not going to whisper in my ear "hey, what do you think, is he in or out?" But He is going to lean over and whisper "hey, did you feed my sheep?" I need eyes that see better, that see the child of God in front of me, regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, or (add your own). Eyes that see the hurt, the rejection, the brokeness. Eyes that see the need for grace, not condemnation.

I learned a long time ago that when you hear something repeatedly from different sources in a very short period of time, that you had better pay close attention. It is 99.9% of the time God trying to get your attention. The onslaught of this message to me is continuous. The next few posts will be about this weird love Jesus commanded.

It may be nuts to you.....